9 Ways To Respond When Prayers Go Unanswered
There moments in our spiritual journey when we pray and it seems our prayers go unanswered. I’ve been there. I’m sure you have too. But it’s during these times, I’ve found my faith and love toward God grow and increase.
It is during these challenging times that the depth of one’s response becomes a pivotal aspect of spiritual growth and resilience. And I want share with you nine Biblical ways to navigate the complex emotions and uncertainties that accompany unanswered prayers.
In other words, what to do when your prayers go unanswered.
9 Ways to Respond When Prayers Go Unanswered
- Evaluate Motives
“Search me, God, and know my heart;
Psalm 139:23-24
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.”
One of the first ways we can respond to unanswered prayer is to evaluate our motives, do a little introspection. Are we praying for God’s glory? Are we seeking His will?
The truth is, sometimes prayers go unanswered because we “ask amiss” (James 4:3). Are requests can be selfish, vain, and conceited. God doesn’t answer those prayers. We’ll talk more about that later.
So, when a prayer goes unanswered, evaluating our motives is a good place to start. If our motives are amiss, then we can take the opportunity to align our hearts with God. We can pray and ask Him to search our hearts and lead us in the way everlasting.
However, if our motives are pure, then we can continue on with these other ways to respond to unanswered prayer.
2. Be Patient and Persist in Prayer
“Wait for the Lord;
Psalm 27:14
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord.“
If our motives are pure, then we should persist in prayer. Jesus tells a story about the importance of patience and persistence in prayer. It’s found in Luke 18:1-8, and goes something like this,
There was a judge in this certain town who was a real Scrooge. He didn’t care about other people, and he didn’t follow God. Someone that probably should never have been a judge.
One day there was this widow, who approached this judge and said, “Please sir, give me justice against my accuser.” The judge didn’t care and didn’t listen. So, she asked again. He gave the same response. So, she asked again. And again the same response. So, she asked again. And again the same response.
This went on for some time. Until one day, she asked again. This time his response was different. He thought, “I don’t care about this woman and I don’t care what God thinks about the matter. But she will not shut up. So, I’ll giver her justice. That way things won’t escalate and she’ll leave me alone.”
Jesus concludes this story by saying that God is different than this unjust judge. God will bring justice and quickly for His people. So, when our prayers go unanswered, we can keep praying and trust that justice, that an answer is right around the corner. Which brings us to the next way we can respond.
3. Trust in God
“But [God] said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness…”
2 Corinthians 12:9
A third way that we can respond to unanswered prayer is by trusting God. Trusting in His all sufficient grace. There is this story tucked away in the book of 2 Corinthians that Paul tells of a man, which is later discovered to be himself.
He’s taken up to heaven in some way and sees incredible things. Things we can’t even begin to imagine. Paul not only sees incredible things, but is also given a “thorn in the flesh.” This, he says, was to keep him humble.
What this thorn is, we don’t really know, because he doesn’t tell us. It could have been a physical, spiritual, or emotional affliction. Speculation abounds and ranges from an eye problem, to migraines, to epilepsy, to problems with people. We simply don’t know.
But what we do know is that it was the result of torment from a messenger or Satan. Paul prayed three times for God to remove this thorn in the flesh. But Paul’s prayers went unanswered. He didn’t get his thorn removed.
Instead, he was told, “My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in your weakness.”
Paul trusted that and lived his life boasting not in all the good he did for God, but in his weaknesses. The insults he received, the suffering he endured. Why? Because it was an opportunity for God to display His glory.
So, when our prayers go unanswered, we ought to trust in this same truth. To trust in God and His grace. The reality is that we can boast in our own unanswered prayers. Because God can use them to keep us dependent on Him, to keep us in a deeper and closer relationship with Him, than if He answered them.
4. Worship the Lord
“I will extol the Lord at all times;
Psalm 34:1
his praise will always be on my lips.“
A fourth way that we can respond to unanswered prayer is through worship. We ought to worship the Lord when He does not answer our prayers. God is worthy of our worship at all times, regardless of our circumstances.
There is this story in 2 Samuel 12 where King David is approached after having an affair. He’s approached by this prophet who weaves this story of a rich man stealing a poor man’s sheep to feed a traveler multiple times, reflecting David’s affair.
David, of course, was furious and wanted justice for the poor man and ordered the rich man to die. The prophet told the King that he, King David, was the rich man. The prophet left and God allowed the baby from this affair to get ill.
For an entire week David prayed and fasted and mourned and repented, hoping God would spare the child’s life. David’s prayer went unanswered. The child died. The Bible records David’s response,
“Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. “
2 Samuel 12:20
Then he went home and ate. This may seem like an unusual response. It certainly did to David’s court. But it shows us that worshipping God ought to be a natural response to unanswered prayer. We don’t worship God just because He’s answered our prayers. He is worthy of our worship regardless.
5. Find Support and Community
“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.“
Hebrews 10:24-25
A fifth way that we can and should respond to unanswered prayer is by seeking support in the fellowship of other believers. We aren’t made to go through life alone.
Life is hard.
The Christian life is harder.
That is why the Bible consistently calls us and commands us to gather together to love and encourage one another.
But when our prayers go unanswered or aren’t answered the way we want, it’s easy to skip church. We simply don’t feel like going. We are not in the mood to worship God and talk about His goodness, love, grace, and mercy, when our prayers are unanswered. But that is exactly when we should go.
Let me tell you something: the day is coming when God will answer all your prayers. I know it seems a long way off, but the day is coming. I know you may have been praying for years. But the day is coming when God will answer every prayer, wipe away every tear.
In the meantime, when your prayers go unanswered, seek comfort and support through the Church.
6. Submit to God’s Wisdom
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
Proverbs 3:5-6
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.“
The sixth way that we can do when our prayers go unanswered is to submit to God’s wisdom. These verses in Proverbs challenge us to submit to God’s wisdom and not depend on our own.
When our prayers go unanswered one of two things may be true. Either answering our prayer will not bring God the most glory or it will not bring us the most good. God works for His glory and our good. So, when our prayers are left unanswered, then it may be the case that it is not what is best.
So, what we should do is keep praying, trust God, and submit to God’s wisdom.
Did you know that Jesus prayed a prayer that went unanswered?
Yeah, in the garden of Gethsemane right before His death, Jesus prayed for God to find another way. Jesus’ prayer went unanswered. Why? Because His death on the cross for our sins brought God the most glory and us infinite goodness.
But Jesus illustrated this truth of submitting to God’s wisdom in His prayer. He prayed, “Not My will, but Your’s be done” (Luke 22:42). What a powerful example of how to respond to unanswered prayer.
Our response to unanswered prayer must involve surrendering to God, His will and His wisdom. And remembering His faithfulness. And that happens to be the next point.
7. Remember God’s Faithfulness
“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
Lamentations 3:22-23
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;“
The seventh way that we ought to respond to unanswered prayer is by remembering God’s faithfulness. God is faithful now and always. That is something that we know, but tend to forget, especially in the midst of unanswered prayers.
Lamentations is a book written by the weeping prophet, Jeremiah. He ministered during the fall of Jerusalem. So, Lamentations if full of grief. Grief over national sinfulness. Grief over unrepentant hearts. Grief over righteous judgement. And grief over unanswered prayers.
But it is also in Lamentations that we find verses like this one above. Little constant reminders of God’s love and faithfulness.
Yeah, there are times when our prayers may go unanswered. But that is not a sign of a lack of God’s love. God’s love for you is eternal. Constant and never failing. So when your prayers go unanswered, remember God’s faithfulness and love. God loves you, cares about you, and is there for you.
8. Seek Comfort in God’s Word
“My comfort in my suffering is this:
Psalm 119:50
Your promise preserves my life.“
The eighth thing that we can do when our prayers go unanswered is to seek comfort in God’s Word, the Bible. It’s hard when our prayers go unanswered. We feel let down, disappointed, hurt. At least, I do. In short, it feels kind of like we are suffering. Then, like this verse says, we should turn to God’s word.
The Bible is full of God’s promises. These promises can be a huge comfort to us in the midst of our unanswered prayers. We can be reminded of God’s faithfulness, goodness, and blessing.
Here’s the beauty of it all. God’s Spirit, the Holy Spirit, resides within us and can remind us of these promises when we need them. The Bible calls Him our Comforter, John 14:26 reads,
“But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.”
So, when our prayers are left unanswered we can turn to God for comfort, His Spirit will guide us to the right passages in His Word, reminding us of the promises of God.
9. Consider Spiritual Warfare
“Then [the Angel] continued, “…Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them. But the prince of the Persian kingdom resisted me twenty-one days.“
Daniel 10:12-13
The last thing that we need to do when our prayers go unanswered is to consider spiritual warfare. In this story in Daniel, he prayed for wisdom and understanding. And God answered His prayer. But it still took 21 days for Daniel to know. But, in those 21 days it seemed like Daniel’s prayer was unanswered.
Sometimes God does answer our prayers, but it takes a spiritual war for us to see the end result. Sometimes, the answers simply take time to arrive.
We can pray a prayer and God can answer. But for whatever reason, for circumstances outside of our control, we don’t see the answer for a while. So our prayers may feel unanswered. But the reality is that they have been answered.
So, we need faith, patience, and perseverance. We can respond with all these other ways in the meantime. Because we have faith that God has answered our prayer. We have faith in who God and what He’s said. So, when our prayers go unanswered, let’s not rush to conclusions, but have faith in God instead.
| Response | Question | Reflection |
|---|---|---|
| Evaluate Motives | Am I praying with pure motives, seeking God’s will and glory? | Assess the sincerity and alignment of your motives in prayer. |
| Be Patient and Persist in Prayer | Am I willing to persist in prayer, trusting God’s timing and justice? | Consider your patience level and commitment to persistent prayer, even in the face of delays. |
| Trust in God | How can I trust in God’s all-sufficient grace during this season of unanswered prayer? | Examine your ability to trust in God’s grace and sovereignty, even when prayers seem unanswered. |
| Worship the Lord | Can I worship God, acknowledging His worthiness, even in the midst of unanswered prayers? | Evaluate your willingness to worship God irrespective of the circumstances surrounding unanswered prayers. |
| Find Support and Community | Am I seeking support from fellow believers during times of unanswered prayer? | Reflect on your openness to seeking encouragement and support within your faith community. |
| Submit to God’s Wisdom | How can I actively submit to God’s wisdom rather than relying solely on my understanding? | Assess your willingness to trust God’s wisdom and submit to His plans, even if they differ from your expectations. |
| Remember God’s Faithfulness | In what ways can I recall and meditate on God’s faithfulness, especially when prayers go unanswered? | Consider how you can intentionally remember and draw upon God’s faithfulness during challenging times. |
| Seek Comfort in God’s Word | How can I turn to God’s Word for comfort and assurance when facing unanswered prayers? | Assess your reliance on Scripture for comfort and seek ways to incorporate it into your response. |
| Consider Spiritual Warfare | Am I considering the possibility of spiritual warfare affecting the delivery of answers to my prayers? | Reflect on your awareness of spiritual realities and how they may impact the outcomes of your prayers. |
Why Prayers Go Unanswered
We’ve talked a lot about how to respond and what to do when our prayers go unanswered. But let’s take a moment to see why they go unanswered in the first place.
A.W. Tozer was a pastor, author, and theologian. He wrote a lot about prayer and why it goes unanswered.1 At one point, he says that the idea that God always answers prayer is in fact quite dangerous for Christians.
According to Tozer, two things must be true for a prayer to be considered as answered by God.
- A clear request to God for a specific favor must be made, and
- There must be a clear receiving of the favor in response.
So, according to Tozer, if God answers with a “no” or “wait” it’s not really an answer. You can argue that “no” and “wait” are answers, and to an extent they are.
But they are not in the sense we commonly use when we talk about God answering our prayers. Usually, we refer to answered prayer as being a positive response. I think that is where Tozer is coming from.
Regardless, he says two conditions must meet for prayer to be answered. They are,
- We must pray in the will of God, and
- We must live lives pleasing to God.
These two conditions are affirmed in Scripture. 1 John 5: 14-15 reads,
“This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.”
and James 5:16 reads in part,
“The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”
In other words, the prayers of someone who does right and lives according to God’s word, and prays in the will of God are powerful and effective. Their prayers change things. Prayer changes things.
If you are curious and want to know how and what exactly prayer changes, then be sure to check out this article. It goes into detail about the power of prayer and what exactly prayer can and cannot change.
Tozer once said,
“The truth is God always answers the prayer that accords with His will as revealed in the Scriptures, provided the one who prayed is obedient and trustful. Further than this we dare not go.”
A.W. Tozer
We ought to be careful in being too hard on ourselves when our prayers go unanswered. Yes, we should make sure we are praying in God’s will and not living in sin. It that is the case, then as Tozer said, “Further than this we dare not go” in speculating why our prayers may be unanswered.
We can, however, respond biblically. By trusting God’s will, submitting to His wisdom, remembering His faithfulness, and worshipping Him. Because He is worthy of it all.
Dangers of Unanswered Prayer
Tozer talked not only about why prayers go unanswered, but also the dangers of unanswered prayer. He highlighted three dangers of unanswered prayer. They are,
- Unbelief: Unanswered prayers can breed doubt and unbelief, causing individuals to question God’s existence, goodness, or willingness to answer their prayers.
- Unreality: The disappointment of unanswered prayers may lead to a sense of detachment from reality. Individuals might become disheartened, feeling as if their prayers and faith are not real or that God Himself is not real.
- Enemy takes Ground: Spiritual adversaries may exploit the vulnerability caused by unanswered prayers to gain a foothold in a person’s life. This could manifest as increased temptation, discouragement, or the amplification of existing struggles.
These are just some of the dangers of unanswered prayer. The truth is, if our prayers are consistently going unanswered, then we need to do some soul searching. Unanswered prayer should be the exception, not the norm.
After we’ve done our soul searching, or better yet, let God do our soul searching with us, and we’ve got a clean bill health. Then we can respond like we’ve discussed above, and have confidence that God has already answered our prayer, even if we haven’t seen the result. This reminds me of Ephesians 1:3
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.”
Read it closely. It reads, “who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing.” We already have everything we need, that includes the answers to our prayers, that align with God’s will. Remember that, and there’s a few other things that’s important to remember.
Things to Remember When Prayer Goes Unanswered
When prayers go unanswered it can be easy to forget some key truths about God and His CHaracter. Graciously, the Holy Spirit reminds us of His promises, as we’ve already discussed above. But I want to take a moment to encourage and remind you of some truths as well.
God loves you, cares about you, and is there for you.
It’s crucial to remember that God’s love is unwavering, irrespective of the circumstances or the apparent silence of unanswered prayers. His care for His children is not contingent upon the fulfillment of every prayer but is rooted in His character of love and compassion.
“How precious is your steadfast love, O God! The children of mankind take refuge in the shadow of your wings.”
Psalm 36:7
God Knows our Needs
God, being omniscient, all-knowing, is fully aware of our needs even before we express them in prayer. His knowledge extends beyond our understanding, and He is intimately acquainted with every detail of our lives.
“Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”
Matthew 6:8
God Hears our Prayers
Even when prayers seem unanswered, it’s essential to recognize that God hears every sincere prayer. His silence does not indicate deafness or indifference but rather an unfolding of His divine plan in His perfect timing.
“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.”
Psalm 34:17
Key Takeaways
When prayer goes unanswered we can respond in the following way,
- Evaluate our motives
- Be patient and Persistent in prayer
- Trust in God
- Worship the Lord
- Find support and community
- Submit to God’s Wisdom
- Remember God’s Faithfulness
- Seek comfort in God’s Word
- Consider Spiritual Warfare
Always remember: God loves you, wants to hear from you, and give you the best. And Jesus is the best.
- Tozer, A. W., and W. L. Seaver. Prayer: Communing with God in Everything–Collected Insights from A. W. Tozer. Moody Publishers, 2016.
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